When I mentioned Howard Glasser's work, The Nurtured Heart Approach during one of my seminars as an example of a program for developing positive parenting/teaching/therapy skills, someone in the back asked, ‘Is that back in style again?’
Thequestion caught me by surprise. Things go in and out of fashion, it’s true. But this method seems to have a great deal of relevance today:
“Parenting skills training helps parents learn how to use a system of rewards and consequences to change a child's behavior.Parents are taught to give immediate and positive feedback for behaviors they want to encourage, and ignore or redirect behaviors they want to discourage.”
There are other “flavors” of positive interaction programs including Love and Logic and Positive-Parenting. It is the simplicity of the Nurtured Heart Approach that draws me to it.
Glasser’s three big lessons are:
1) Do not feed a child’s negative impulses with attention to him when he is acting-out2) Give tons of positive attention to the child at times when he is not acting out
3) Absolutely follow through with consequences when a rule is broken rule so that there is no confusion regarding what is okay and what is not okay.
A 6-hour internet-based training class (for CEUs) is available from Glasser that very clearly describes his philosophy and shows how his techniques can help the challenging children and adults in your life.